'Girls' Star Lena Dunham Opens Up About Being Sexually Assaulted in College

AP Dunham's book was released Tuesday.Relatability is quite an achievement for a self-obsessed artist who wrote and directed her first full-length feature film, “Tiny Furniture,” at age 24 and won a Golden Globe last year for writing, directing and acting in her hit HBO series. She has been called the voice of her generation and named one of Time magazine’s 100 most influential people in the world. She has completed her third season of “Girls” and signed a $3.5 million book deal.

Everyone slows down to see a wreck on the highway. Few of us stick around to see the cleanup and the repairs. But that’s what Lena Dunham is asking us to do in her hotly anticipated memoir, “Not That Kind of Girl: A Young Woman Tells You What She’s ‘Learned.’ ” The book, published Tuesday, reveals a dark past laden with sexual assault, eating disorders and a dire discomfort in her own skin. It’s a lot more naked than Dunham’s character on “Girls.” Given that Dunham’s story includes therapy when she was in her single digits, ongoing battles with obsessive-compulsive disorder, and more failed relationships than Henry VIII, some readers might be wondering what they can learn from this privileged 28-year-old’s so-called life. Possibly everything. “By revealing so much, Lena Dunham becomes that much more relatable because she’s not hiding her imperfections, like most young women in Hollywood do,” pop-culture and lifestyle expert Valerie Greenberg tells the News Agency. “She’s no-bulls---, she’s down to earth, and she seems like she can be your best friend.”

The resulting memoir — inspired by Helen Gurley Brown’s 1982 credo “Having It All,” which Dunham happened upon at a thrift shop — is a vehicle for twentysomethings to navigate the transition from adolescence to adulthood. In other words, here’s a guide for steering clear of Lena Dunham’s wreckage. Perhaps Dunham’s 28-year-old peers Lindsay Lohan, Shia LaBeouf and Amanda Bynes should read it.

“If I could take what I’ve learned and make one menial job easier for you, or prevent you from having the kind of sex where you feel you must keep your sneakers on in case you want to run away during the act, then every misstep of mine was worthwhile,” Dunham writes in the introduction.

Fully half of the book is about sex — specifically, the neurotic Dunham’s inability to enjoy it. “I was so worried about whether other people were enjoying sex with me that it never would have occurred to me that it was an act I was supposed to receive any pleasure from,” she writes. The insecurity led to reliance on prescription drugs — she carries around Advil, Lexapro, Mucinex, Klonopin and Tamiflu for “emotional security” — as well as anorexia and a sexual assault in college for which, naturally, she blames herself.

“I feel like there are 50 ways it’s my fault,” she writes in the chapter titled “Barry.” “I was hungry to be seen. But I also know that at no moment did I consent to being handled that way. I never gave him permission.”

The lesson? The truth can boost self-image, not destroy it. “The knowledge (that I didn’t consent) has kept me from sinking,” Dunham writes. Dunham’s version of self-help is definitely more self than help, but even as readers find themselves cringing, they’ll also be laughing — say, at the time Dunham masturbated in third grade (page 16) or had diarrhea during a nude scene (page 99), or when she compares sex to “shoving a loofah into a Mason jar” (page 10).

Much like her life, Dunham is turning her 12-city book tour — whose 8,000 out-of-town tickets sold out, with some being scalped for $900 — into a traveling variety show, with comedian Amy Schumer and poet Mary Karr. Last month, nearly 600 people responded to an open call to perform at her book signings. She ended up hiring — and eventually paying, after she was caught stiffing them — a sand artist, a ukulele player and some a cappella singers. In New York, fans had to wait on line to see her — and hundreds did Tuesday.

“She’s refreshing,” said teacher Nicole Dostal, 37, of the East Village. “She’s real, so it’s unique and that’s impressive despite her age.” Ali Fischer, 29, was also on line at the Union Square Barnes & Noble hours before Dunham’s appearance Tuesday night. “She’s not a fake,” added Fischer. “She’s a real person, and she’s entertaining because she talks about real people.” There is one thing Dunham won’t discuss — and it offers perhaps her greatest lesson. Her lips — and her pen cap — are absolutely sealed when it comes to talking about her boyfriend of two years, musician Jack Antonoff. “I have written sentences about how the first time we made love it felt like dropping my keys on the table after a long trip ... about the way he gathered me up after a long terrible day and put me to bed ... about the fact that he is my family now. But surveying those words, I realized they are mine. He is mine to protect,” she writes. Women have been handing down that bit of advice for generations, but it certainly applies to information: Less can indeed be more.